Yesterday I was forced to look at myself and the fact that I have an addiction. I went without my precious internet and Facebook yesterday, not by choice, but by meaness from the great computer god. I sat and wailed "why me computer god"? What have I done to offend you? How can I appease you, an offering, a sacrifice? Are you mad that I never clean the vehicle of your expression? Did I swear too much (cant help that)? Was I rude to eat in front of you and not offer you any. I really didnt think you would want what I eat.
Who have you been talking to and what are they saying behind my back? None of its true! Is that why you are so quiet? You and your cohorts are plotting against me? Thats it, isnt it? Well I aint going down without a fight!
My hand, operating on its own with orders from God knows who, was ordered to slap some sense into me. Wait a minute, could I, would I, be addicted, and Im going through td's? Just one day without my computer and I was going crazy! I didnt know what to do with myself. I was getting upset that I might be missing something that would be life-changing. No matter what I did, in the back of my mind I hear in a mechanical voice, COMPUTER COMPUTER. I was forced to take a good look at myself and see that I put way too much time into this machine. That is all that it is, a thing. I started accomplishing the things I had written on my to-do list, marking them off, one by one. Its good to be clean. I can think clearly. I see my world and my place in it.
Yesterday was one of the most fun, busy, fulfilling days that I have had in a while. And I really learned something. But thank God its working today!!!!!!!
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